Anger ; How to control

Anger is a natural emotion that we all experience at different times. Anger may be a secondary response to feeling sad, lonely or frightened. When we become hyper; anger comes out in full rage , we lose our judgement power; quite possible. Chances are very bright that our thinking can become impaired and we are more likely to do and say unreasonable and irrational things. We are so much in the control of this powerful emotion that we hardly realize at that time how we behaved or acted in a certain manner.

I believe, most common factors that make people angry are  grief, humiliation,  injustice, disappointment, failure, stress, embarrassment, any kind of abuse, illness(physical and mental), any kind of irritation etc. But don’t you all feel whatever the reason is it’s consequences are queer, terrible and threatening for sure. So, what’s required on our part? We must put efforts to get our anger under control .We need to enable to ourselves to cope and deal with anger; stress. Life we use all possible techniques to reduce stress , certainly we can channelize our anger into socially reliable behavior.

Let’s put certain tips altogether to manage anger in a positive way .

v  DON’T MAKE ANGER A HABIT

 Nothing is impossible. Hence, we can control our anger no matter what degree it is  …

v  TAKE A TIMEOUT.

Timeout!!!! Are we kids? No, but sometimes Yes!!! Give yourself  breaks during tims of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you prepare yourself what’s ahed; what can be a better way out of a particular situation without getting angry or irritated.

v  ONCE YOU’RE CALM ,EXPRESS YOUR ANGER.

As soon as you start thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive way. Don’t confront the person in front of you. State your concerns and points with clarity, without hurting others or trying to control them.

v  THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK

Sometimes we act impulsive, in the heat of the moment, it is easy to say something you may regret later. Take a few moments , soothe yourself , collect your thoughts before you say anything. And you must allow others involved in the situation to do the same.

v  DON’T HOLD A GRUDGE

Forgiveness is a powerful tool. Don’t allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings. If you forgive someone who has angered you, you boyh might learn from the situation. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone behave exactly as you want.

v  IDENTIFY POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS

Instead of focusing on what made you angry, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child’s messy room drive you crazy? Close the door. Remind yourself that anger won’t fix anything and might only make it worse.

v  UNDERSTAND OTHERS’ VIEWS

Try to understand the other person’s point of view. That’s the only way out to reduce anger as according to them, they are right and you can’t change that.

v  PRACTICE RELAXATION SKILLS

Whenever your temper flares, put relaxation skills into practice. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene ,or repeat a calming phrase such as ‘Take it easy’. Seems unrealistic!!! But believe me, it really works. You might also listen to music, write your feelings or do a few yoga exercises; whatever relaxes you.

v  USE HUMOUR TO HELP

Lightening up can diffuse tension. Use humour,fun to help you face what’s making you angry. Personally, I’m very fortunate to have my dear son whose one-liners, that too very spontaneous , make me smile whatever the situation is. Oh! Smile is an underrated word in his case, it’s laugh actually. Avoid sarcasm, it may hurt feelings and make things worse.

v  GET SOME EXERCISE

We all are very much aware of the fact that physical activities can help us reduce stress that can lead you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.

v  KNOW WHEN TO SEEK HELP

Don’t hesitate to ask help from others to sort out matters.

Hoping these views of mine would benefit you in real terms. Try and follow these points. It’s our utmost duty to keep ourselves happy; n for that , just put these simple techniques into practice.

SEE YOU SOON WITH MY NEXT BLOG…

Radiate Positivity !!!

This new blog of mine is all about what we want in our life and what we get and how! our aspirations, desires and what’s the end point…..

We all often determine living in abundance, a powerful life but then the question occurs, ‘why isn’t everyone a life according to his or her dreams?’ And the reply to this, according to me, is people don’t achieve what they want as they constantly keep on thinking but they don’t want to have,  their focus in mainly on that only. Just remember, you are a living magnet. Whatever come to your mind, you attracts the same, Your thoughts, your insight determine what you get. Certainly, its impossible to feel good and at same time be having negative thoughts, if you are feeling good, its because you are having good thoughts. You can have whatever in your life, there is absolutely no limits; you just have to feel good. Isn’t that all you ever want ?

You are getting exactly what you are feeling about, not what you are thinking about. If you start your day on good note, remember, you will most certainly attract more situation and people like that and happy feeling sustains. We all experienced days when one thing after another goes wrong, henceforth it becomes a chain of bad thoughts until you move yourself out of this spiral by just changing your thoughts to something positive like what you want etc.

Weather we realize it or not, we are thinking most of the time; like you are listening to someone, reading or watching a show, when you recall from past or consider something about the future, weather you are driving or getting ready you are thinking. Guess, what the only time we are not thinking while we are at sleep. So, our last thoughts are also being operated as we fall asleep, remember to feel good before going to bed.

If you can think about what you want and make it your dominant thought you will bring it in to your life. This is the most powerful thing we can do today and always. Do it for ourselves, its natural how much you think about a thing of your choice. You feel more and more excited to achieve that.  You will consider it your ambition of life, attract it with all your magnetic power of desire. By such thoughts in your mind you will create a certain kind of energy, that will attract all resources, opportunities and circumstances to work in your favor and help you achieve your goals.

Now lets all, me as well you to read my blogs, try to follow these things for our brighter future: -

Ø  Be positive

Ø  Thoughts are magnetic; think good get goodness in return

Ø  If you want to change anything in your life, change your thoughts

Ø  What you think about the most, it happens. So, you know what you have to think about. Isn’t it?

Ø  It all around us; we just need to look carefully and understand

Ø  Your life is in your hands, you can change your life.

Ø  No matter where you are now, no matter what has happened in your life, you can always began to consciously choose your thoughts.

Ø  There is no such thing as hopeless situation.

Ø  Every single circumstance can change for better

Ø  If you see it in mind, you are going to hold it in your hand.

Leaving you all with these positive thoughts until my next blog...

Forgiveness !! A Key to Mental Peace

‘To err is human, to forgive is divine.’

It’s a saying everyone has gone through at some point of life. To many a people amongst us, it’s not easy to follow as to say it. Well, I too agree to that. But, I must confess, over the recent years, I’ve found certain measures, reasons and method how to forgive someone who has hurt someone. ‘would love to share in this blog of mine’ and hope you can relate to something happened in your own life.

First, let’s all find out why we should forgive someone. I can vividly remember a line said by an American comedian, Buddy Hackett;

“I have had few arguments with people, but I can never carry a grudge. You know why? While you’re carrying a grudge, they are out dancing.”

It certainly true, whenever you are upset or angry with person, you are giving the rein of your emotions to the hand of that person. So, neither should u care about the behavior of someone who hurt you, nor should you feel the need to like that person. You have to forgive that person, only to return back to your own life. So in a way, it’s a very selfish thing to forgive someone, not related to that person at all. It’s only relatively concerned about your own mental balance and peace of mind.

As Guru Ji says, “Shukrana …”. It becomes easy to forgive. How ? whenever you think about person say “God bless you, I forgive you for everything and wish good for you.” Think positive and it will destroy all negative energy in your mind.

Whenever you let other go after forgiving them, you feel a sense of happiness and positivity. Certainly you are going to feel more energetic, strong and self-confident.

To be free from the hatred because of anger for someone, the best way is to write to that person regarding that, which in turn will liberate you from the kinds of anger, dis-satisfaction and negativity like feelings. Don’t ever trouble yourself, thinking about the reaction of the person related. It’s not your concern, none of your business. Your motive must only be to release yourself and live peaceful life.

Learn to forgive yourself too. Whatever wrong has been done with you by anyone, stop worrying about that. Its all past now. Its your life; don’t punish yourself for the wrong done by someone else. Be good and leave their deeds to them only. Stop cribbing about past events as certain people and situations can never be changed so, why to bother? Be a mature person, forgive yourself for not saying certain things at a particular time for not making the other person understand. Free yourself from any kind of burden. Also, may be you have done or said something and you regret about it, just let the person know that you are sorry for it.  Doesn’t matter what’s the reaction, you are free from it anyway.

I guess each and every word written here is true as we all relate to it at some point of life. In a nutshell, at 45, I believe forgiveness is the only key to attain happiness and peace of mind in life.

                                  

A Ray of Sunshine

Sunshine has different meanings; elaboration according to an individual’s viewpoint.

To me, it’s achieving a perfect balance of mind and heart, to control over mental agitation (no matter how hard it is) and to understand when you must suppress what your heart desires.

Very often it happens that most of us feels a sense of temporary joy, by acquiring new things and forget to attain mental peace. It’s a saying; “Do good, have good.” You must be good to others but don’t expect the other person to be equally good that’s your karma. So, just do good and leave the rest to god.

If you want to achieve mental peace in today’s world we should understand what present, past and future signify in one’s life. After learning from the past, let it go.

After making a vision and planning accordingly, leave any kind of worrying of the future. Present is the greatest present of god; enjoy it. Take out time during the day when you can curb the urge to speak even for few minutes as silence provides an opportunity for self – introspection.

A few valid points we can imbibe to attain long-lasting mental peace:

Ø  Expectations reduce joy; Don’t expect

Ø  Do not give suggestion to other until you are asked for

Ø  Do not compete and compare with anybody; You are unique

Ø  Aim for constant improvement in yourself; always a scope

Ø  Past: gone, future: unknown, Live in the present with happiness

Ø  Observe, do not react

Ø  Control desires; be contented

Try to implement all these, better times ahead.

See you all soon